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The Apprentice: what a bunch of wannabe entrepreneurs

Real Business magazine is all about the entrepreneurs making things happen and those with entrepreneurial spirit. Does watching a dramatised and comically elongated job interview really entertain the typical reader that much? Apparently so, if the activity on the website and message boards is anything to go by – and this surprises me a little.

If the candidates are that entrepreneurial, why aren’t they out trying to build a business or make some money on their own? Surely, they would want to be calling the shots for themselves on their own projects?

Not these contestants. That is because most of them don’t seem like real entrepreneurs at all. They are more the equivalent of Big Brother contestants, thinking an appearance on the show might open a few doors for them and kick-start something – and I suppose it might, but that has nothing to do with being an entrepreneur.

If that is the case then fair play, but let’s call a spade and spade and stop pretending that the show is something it isn’t. more

Open business boost

A YOUNG entrepreneur is hoping to boost sales at his fledgling online golf store with an expected surge of interest in the sport following the dramas at this year's Open.

Jamie O'Neill, 21, believes golflocker Golf Locker business student is set to build on its first year's £250,000 turnover.

Jamie said: "Golf is one of the up and coming popular sports in the North East and I have certainly been impressed by how many people want to pick it up by purchasing one of our starter bags. Whenever a big sporting tournament is broadcast on TV you always get people surfing for the sport on the internet."

The site, www.thegolflocker.co.uk, sells a wide range of equipment from tees to videos aimed at improving accuracy and swing. It also sells a starter bag at £90, which includes a driver, irons, putters and balls. more

Aigo Welcomes Media Visits During Beijing Olympics

Being an entrepreneur with a global perspective, Mr. Feng Jun, president of Aigo, has always advocated the mission to establish Aigo as an international brand that proudly originated in China. Having strengthened its presence in the Singaporean and Southeast Asian markets in just three years, Aigo has entered the European market. The sponsorship of the F1 McLaren team and the appearance of the Aigo logo on a McLaren F1 racing car helped enormously in promoting Aigo's internationalization process. Aigo's Involvement in the Olympics On November 22nd, 2007, Mr. Feng Jun officially signed an agreement with the Olympic Museum in Lausanne, Switzerland, thus inaugurating the Company as the first Chinese high-tech brand to ever enter the Olympic Museum. In 2007, Aigo's subsidiary, Aifly, became the 2008 Beijing Language Training Service supplier and the 2008 Beijing International Media Center cooperation partner in order to bridge and overcome possible language and culture barriers during the Olympics. more

Stocks rise on employment data, Fed borrowing plan

Oil prices fell again, adding to Wall Street's upbeat mood, and the Dow Jones industrial average rose more than 100 points.

Automatic Data Processing said private sector employment rose by 9,000 during this month. After seeing jobs disappear by the thousands in recent months, the stock market is eager for any insights into the Labor Department's take on the job market on Friday.

The Federal Reserve announced it was extending its emergency borrowing program for Wall Street banks, which reassured the market that investment banks won't suffer from liquidity problems. The central bank will also now allow commercial banks to bid on cash loans that last for 84 days, besides the 28-day loans that are now available. The original program allowing investment firms to turn to the Fed for a quick source of cash will now run through Jan. more

Latest Business Cards For Bartenders News

Todd English P.U.B.: A college bar for grownups - Las Vegas Weekly

But there was something unusual among the dark suits and passed business cards — adults chugging beer ... But you can cash in four times per visit; bartenders said the promotion had proved a bit costly for the bar in its first few weeks.

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An inviting atmosphere - Southtown Star

Credit cards: All major cards are accepted ... It's the perfect chance to grab a quick cocktail with a friend, have a bite and go about your business. There's no limit. So, if you'd like to linger, order two more if you have more room in your stomach ...

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Africans, Asians, Hispanics...and Hipsters: Changes in ... - San Diego weekly Reader

The services include assistance with marketing and advertising, with business cards, brochures, and websites ... Paloma Ceballos is one of the Tower’s bartenders. Like Mick Rossler, she is a jeans and T-shirt kind of girl. Plus a leather studded ...

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Business Cards For Bartenders Questions asked

Resolved Question: :) what's your best joke/comeback(s)?

jokes: whats two things you can't give a black person? a black eye and a fat lip :) a string walks into a bar. the bartender says "sorry we don't serve strings." so then the string goes into the parking lot rolls on the grow and pitches a fit. then he walks back into the bar and the bartender ask "arent you a string" and he replies "no, im afraid not(a frayed knot) why does helen keller play the piano with only one hand? she sings with the other :) a couple of hunters are out in the woods when one of them falls to the ground. he doesn't seem to be breathing, his eyes are rolled back in his head. the other guy pulls out his cell phone and calls 911. he gasps to the operator “my friend is dead! what can I do?” the operator, in a calm soothing voice says “just take it easy. i can help. first, let's make sure he's dead.” theres a silence, then a shot is heard. the guy's voice comes back on the line. he says “ok, now what?“ two women friends had gone out for a girls night out, and had been decidedly over-enthusiastic on the cocktails. incredibly drunk and walking home they suddenly realized they both needed to pee. they were very near a graveyard and one of them suggested they do their business behind a headstone or something. the first woman had nothing to wipe with so she took off her panties, used them and threw them away. her friend however was wearing an expensive underwear set and didn't want to ruin hers, but was lucky enough to salvage a large ribbon from a wreath that was on a grave and proceeded to wipe herself with it. after finishing, they made their way home. the next day the first woman's husband phones the other husband and said, "these dammn girls nights out have got to stop. my wife came home last night without her panties." "that's nothing," said the other. "mine came back with a sympathy card stuck between the cheeks of her butt that said, 'from all of us at the fire station, we'll never forget you!' a man escapes from prison where he has been for 15 years. he breaks into a house to look for money and guns and finds a young couple in bed. he orders the guy out of bed and ties him to a chair, while tying the girl to the bed he gets on top of her, kisses her neck, then gets up and goes into the bathroom. while he's in there, the husband tells his wife: "listen, this guy's an escaped convict, look at his clothes! he probably spent lots of time in jail and hasn't seen a woman in years. i saw how he kissed your neck." if he wants sex, don't resist, don't complain, do whatever he tells you. satisfy him no matter how much he nauseates you. this guy is probably very dangerous. if he gets angry, he'll kill us. be strong, honey. I love you."to which his wife responds: "he wasn't kissing my neck. he wwas whispering in my ear. he told me he was gay, thought you were cute, and asked me if we had any vaseline. i told him it was in the bathroom. be strong honey. i love you too!! comebacks: you were a failed abortion. your birth certificate is an apology from the condom factory. shut up, you'll never be the man your mother is. i hear when you were a child your mother wanted to hire somebody to take care of you, but the mafia wanted too much. _______________________________ i have alot more but im tired of typing :) so what are yours? more

Voting Question: What kind of business/organization am I?

Forgive me :) My question wasn't answered in my last post. I got an answer that I could have googled months ago. Info: I'm a bartender in Las Vegas, NV. I plan on bartending at private parties, weddings, and corporate events. Whatever I make, 100% will go straight into a charity or some kind of sponsorship. Am I a non-profit? (I don't really care about being tax exempt) Am I a foundation? (I'm going all the money away) Am I a for-profit business giving away all my money? I want something to represent me. I want to make my own business card and have a name represent me. I just need to know what kind of legal actions that I must take. Thanks. more

Resolved Question: Single mother of 5 wonderful of kids?

I am a single mother of 5 and I was recently laid off because the company I worked for went out of business. Because I was a bartender and basically lived off tips I do not receive any unemployment. I know everybody is hurting due to the unemployment rate but I am a believer of "every little bit helps. My kids and I are helping by sending a shoe box full of small toys and hygiene items to kids in Africa. If you are blessed and can help us or know of a church or program helping people in our situation it would be appreciated. Any little thing will help a gift for a kid or two,Prayers letting a friend know, or a gift card. All 5 of my kids made A/B honor roll this year and I they understand my situation and appreciate EVERYTHING. Thank you for reading. If you want to talk to me or have questions email with your number and I call you my kids are 12,10,8,6 and 5 the oldest are boys singlemomsunited2009@yahoo.com more

Resolved Question: Hows my latest chapter *all kinds of criticism welcome*?

Chapter 2: The Badlands and the Informant It’s been four days since Grimoire killed Jose Manguo. He hadn’t got a lot of information since then but he did find out, a few hours ago, at one of the seediest bars in all of Tokyo, from a man who’s nickname was so dirty that if you said it in public you’d either get short or sent to prison, that Yang has been travelling to and from Tokyo and Hiroshima in search of people to help him on a certain ‘ambitious project’ that Yang is currently working on. The man also found out from his friends that Yang has been seen going inside the Kalona Corporation’s office building. “So, Jose wasn’t lying after all huh? Doesn’t matter now anyway.” The Bartender then walked up to Grimoire telling him to stop asking questions and either buy a goddamn drink or get the hell out, James knew he wasn’t going to get anything else form here so he proceeded to walk to the door, but just as he was leaving when he reached the door a tall elder gentleman bumped into him on purpose. “You want to know about Yang Karoshi’s big ‘project’? Then visit this guy…” the tall man said passing the detective something that looked like a business card, “Alec Martin? Hmmmm never heard of the guy.” James said stroking his head and raising his eyebrows in thought. It was later that night, James was waiting at the place the Tall gentleman told him to at the bar, it was a fairly clean and polished part of Tokyo in the center of the city probably, and he hadn’t seen anybody in the past hour that wasn’t a sharply dressed businessman with a briefcase. But a few moments later, he saw someone strange, he was wearing jeans and a hoody, but you couldn’t see his face, he walked up to James in a slow walk sort of like a zombie walk. “Hello detective, I’ve heard you want to know about The Badlands…” said Alec in a muffled voice, James knew it wasn’t his real voice, you wouldn’t talk about Yang in public, or you’ll never walk, talk, hell you wouldn’t even wake up again. “Well yes, I would like to know why Yang Karoshi is travelling around recruiting people for his ‘project’ and what his connection is with the Kalona Company, but while we’re talking, what in the world is The Badlands?” Remarked Grimoire bewildered. “Well, I thought this was just about The Badlands, anything else will be extra” snickered Alec, “Damnit, how much do you want?” James slightly barked at Alec, “Well to know about the Badlands will cost you $100, then its $150 every extra question” Alec told Grimoire now in a serious tone, Grimoire first looked at the boy in shock, then in anger as he reached his hand into his wallet giving the boy $550, cash. “Alright what do you want to know first, detective?” asked Alec staring at Grimoire in a half serious half playful look. “Well firstly, I might aswell ask the question I was originally going to ask, why is Yang travelling around Japan recruiting people?” James questioned, Alec then answered him with a grin,” He’s building his secret ‘project’ of course” James then looked at the Informant for a while before dully asking him what the project is. “Well, it’s extremely complicated to answer, and I’ll probably die no matter what for telling you this but, basically, Karoshi is creating clones of the most important men in the world…” Alec told him which shocked the detective almost to his knees. “B-b-b-but why is he cloning them?” asked a quivering Grimoire, “simple, they’re planning to kill the most famous people in the world, for example, Barack Obama, and then replace them with the clone and the clone then follows orders from Kalona changing the world forever and also because the Kalona Corporation want him and pay him too clone them.” At this moment James thought back to the hotel and Jose telling him about the Kalona Corporation, before returning to the present, “So, Jose wasn’t lying….ok last question, what in god’s name is The Badlands?” asked a still shell shocked detective, “That is the part of Kalona that are in charge of Yang and the clones… or the assassins you could say”. Alec told him For a moment the detective stepped aback in worry aswell as great shock, he just could not believe that Kalona Corporation, one of the biggest company’s in the world, has a section of the company that creates assassin…..clones! But Grimoire didn’t have time to go crazy over clones, he had to find and lock up Yang Karoshi before this whole cloning business gets completely out of hand. “Any way I could meet these Badlands?” Grimoire wondered, “Hmmm, most likely no, but if you really want to I could arrange a meeting, but you will need guns, a lot of guns, because everybody who has ever met the Badlands, has always returned from the meeting with a bullet between their god damn eyes”. Said the Informant with a very serious tone of voice. “I’m willing to take that risk after what I’ve just heard Kalona is trying to do”, Grimoire sharply barked back with an angry look on his face as if to say, Ison of a bitch! its cut off the other half of my chapter O-o more

Resolved Question: Is there anything wrong with my Resume?

I'm not getting any responses to the Emails I have been sending for jobs through Craigslist. I know the market is BAD but I just want to make sure that my resume is okay, and its not turning off employers. Here is the Email I send to potential jobs. Hello, I am responding to the ad on Craigslist. I feel my experience makes me a qualified candidate for this position, and I would love an opportunity to interview. I am a very reliable worker, and I have alot of drive to succeed. I am determined to find a position that I can keep long term, and I feel I would be a great asset to your company. My salary requirements are $15 an hour, but are negotiable depending on the position. I look forward to your call, and thank you for reviewing my response. I have pasted a resume below for your review. Best Regards, Amanda M**** Amanda M***** 123456 W. Cerritos Ave |Anaheim, Ca | (714) Objective Seeking an office position in a growing, fast paced and friendly environment. I would like to utilize my strong organizational and time management skills. I enjoy either working in a small office where I have the opportunity to learn most if not all aspects of that business. Or in a large office where I have the opportunity to show my skills and dedication, and prove that I am a great candidate for advancement. I pride myself in taking great knowledge in my job, and I learn as much as I can about the business I am working for, so that I am a valuable asset. Skills Profile - Microsoft Office, including Word, Excel, PowerPoint, and Outlook. - QuickBooks. - Knowledge of Internet. - Ability to handle multiple tasks. - Ordering office supplies. - Accounts Payable, Accounts Receivable, Billing, Invoicing, Payroll, Collections Petty Cash. - Knowledgeable in office procedures and office machines. Employment History Bartender 10/2008 - 09/2008 Malone's Bar & Grill Santa Ana, Ca Starting Pay: $8.50 Ending Pay: $8.50 - Serve drinks and food to all patrons. - Manage cash register accurately. - Provide excellent customer service, and maintain all aspects of the bar from cleaning and stocking to answering the phone and booking bands and entertainment. Office Manager 06/2008 – 10/2008 Hired Gun Exterminating Garden Grove, Ca Starting Pay: $15.00 Ending Pay: $15.00 - Sit in Office Manager while permanent Manager was on medical leave. - Answer phones, and schedule and dispatch all pest control jobs. - Enter all termite reports and mail reports to customers. - Receive and enter payments for jobs and yearly control policies. Bill customers for yearly controls and occasionally for termite jobs. Office Manager 01/2006 – 03/2008 Super Dave’s Print & Mail Santa Ana, Ca Starting Pay: $13.00 Ending Pay: $16.00 - Input all A/P and A/R, and pay all invoices in a timely manner. - Payroll for 10 employees through ADP. - Maintained account with Health, Life, and 401k companies. - Schedule and dispatch drivers and make sure route is most time efficient. - Sent statements once a month to customers. - Schedule tasks and meetings for all office employees. - Answered 4-line phone, maintained high standard of customer service when speaking to all customers, including remembering customer’s names and order history. - Kept close track of job scheduling, ensuring that no jobs were forgotten, and completed as scheduled and on time. - Use QuickBooks for accounting and PRINTLeader software for all job management. - General office duties included: Bank deposits, ordering office supplies, handle customer transactions, took credit card payments, manage reception desk, and all other general office duties. Administrative Assistant 02/2005 – 01/2006 HCS Cutler, Inc. Rancho Cucamonga , Ca Starting Pay: $11.50 Ending Pay: $13.50 - Managed and logged cash reports printed from registers at 8 different locations. - Managed all bank deposits ensuring timeliness and accuracy as well as reconcile monthly statements. - Investigated and resolved and credit card disputes that were filed.. - Managed a fleet of 60 vehicles, including class A, B, and C trucks. - Completed any necessary paperwork for CA DMV. - Handled all car insurance needs, including: Filing auto accident claims, filling out accident reports, adding and deleting drivers and vehicles to the policy, and following through with adjusters to make sure claims were handled properly. Office Manager 10/2002 – 02/2005 Telcom Services Riverside , Ca Starting Pay: $7.00 Ending Pay: $9.00 - Maintained data logs more

Resolved Question: mature (older) men can you help me figure out whether or not this behavior has anything to do w/ what i think?

i am 34. i have been in love and with the same man for the past 7 years. he is not 59. we have been off & on in the past. we've taken probably 2 breaks that were significant from each other. right now, we are planning to be married and want to conceive a child before the new year. our most recent split involved several months and i became aware of a flirtation he had during this time w/ a local older (in her 40s) overweight female w/ bleach blonde hair. she was a former bartender at a local rest. we frequented. she doesn't work there anymore, but he ran into her out during our split and i found her phone # (which i had due to our 'aquaintence' we weren't what i would call friends) in a pile of business cards and whatnot during the split when i had occasion to be at his house. i could care less. he has never cheated on me, and his brief datings with women during our split have always been on the comical side in retrospect for us both. i don't pry; i don't want to know per se. and i've even told him not to tell me if he ever during those times slept w/ another woman. but every time we run into her now, his whole demeanor changes. he barely says hello to her. he becomes defensive after we leave the place in which we ran into her. and i think he had some sort of intimate contact w/ her, and *i don't care* but what I *would like is some understanding* of why his whole normal self changes so radically after the run in. he barely talks to her. i exchange a cordial hello with her out of pure necessity and then we go on, but he seems disturbed for some time after. and we usually run into her at a place where the locals gather, and i can only fathom that he's worried that i will hear some gossip. but i live w/ him and she is a *non issue* in fact, the very idea she may have hooked up w/ him at some point makes me laugh b/c he had to be drunk enough to think a 200 pound female w/ a cute face and bleach blonde hair was attractive and i know him very well. can anyone explain to me what his mind is going through to cause these changes in his behavior? i can't broach the subject w/ him and don't care to, but i'd like to understand his anger that surfaces after we run to her, and what it's all about?OOPS HE M *IS* 59he is SO not a player. what i am worried about here is not that AT ALL. what i am worried about is the fact that i think he may have gotten drunk and fooled around w/ this chick once, and it was the anomaly and he doesn't know how to deal w/ it around me b/c i insisted i didn't want to every know such a thing. he is good to me, and he always has been. we workout together 6 days a week. we make love all the time. we hardly argue now, but that's not always been true. but things are so good now. it could be just me. my period is due in 3 days. or his may be due. but he was t-totally fine, and we did an hour on the elliptical at the gym watching the hilarious woody paige on around the horn, and then we go to our fav locals spot for a beer after the workout, and we go there several times a week, and the only difference was she was there and he just seemed out of sorts. not his self. *that* is why i care. i care about how he is doing. this is *not* about me. and how lucky am i to say thatwell i have asked him weeks before now thinking it would be nothing for him to tell me, but then i remember i made him swear to always keep such a thing to himself. i don't want to ask again b/c i would be a jealous nag. and i am honestly not jealous, but what in the world did he do to cause a happy go lucky fellow to become anxious/irritable upon her sight? and what i'd also like to know is how to set him at ease now. we are back at home, she's not here, he's with me and the dogs, life is stunningly uncomplicated. how to i disarm him?As always, Ghostman, you can put it in the best terms. I came back to add a detail, after the dogs were walked and he came back home for dinner, and I turned his attention elsewhere (to our favorite baseball team who won today--Det Tigers-- for one) his mind seemed to have been well removed from the previous situation and things here have more than normalized, they have even been loving and thoughtful. We just had a great 'leftover' dinner, and he is now watching an online recap of his team on the other computer. We are getting ready for bed and all the hostility in the air has evaporated. I, for one, am looking forward to the end of the night and a good night's rest, and thanks to everyone for their input. more

Resolved Question: How much should i tip my wedding help bartender,dj,photog,officiant etc...?

I need some advice...should i tip? How much? my photographer is just starting off with her business...so her price was almost half the price of a professional! I am paying $650 plus $65 extra for a disc with all rights to all of my photos to have printed....I still wanted to give her some sort of gift to say thanks for helping us out and for saving so much money! You think maybe a gift card to a restaurant would be reasonable? My dj...is also saving us a little bit of money because he is a past coworker of mine...he is charging us $600 for the whole night everything included...he did however make the comment, in a joking/hinting manner "it will be $600 for the night, and if I do a good job you can tip me if you'd like." So I just don't know how much to give as a tip... My officiant is traveling about 45 mins for our rehearsal the night before and the day of the wedding...so i was thinking a gift card to a restaurant for her as well?? My bartender...maybe a gift of money? I am buying ALL of the liquor, cups, napkins, mixers...EVERYTHING she needs to serve...she just has to show up and serve for 5 hrs I am paying her $15/hr. Plus I will be setting out a tip jar at the reception for her...should I still include a tip in my thank you card??? Caterer...I checked and I am not being charged gratuity it states that "tips are much appreciated however not mandatory." I am having a buffet style wedding...there will be server staff there to help serve the water...and bring in the food, and help package and take down...but that's it. Its a buffet...and we're not having cake for them to serve or cut. I still want to give a tip to show appreciation for their help...but how much?? I wanted to give a more personal gift to my officiant and photographer. As for my bartender, dj, and catering I was thinking a gift of money...I am on a tight budget, I just don't want to seem cheap by any means...but I would like to show my appreciation to everyone helping me create my wedding day! more

Resolved Question: when a business processes credit cards, what percentage or rate do the different companies(visa,etc)charge?

i'm a bartender whom has just started at a new place and for the first time i have an employer taking 2.5% of my credit card tips for the house. they claim this is for the processing of the tips (as in this is what the credit card companies charge). however, when i managed at a different place, the owners told me that the companies charge 15 cents for debit cards and 50 for credit cards. i'm also wondering if this is legal. There was a civil action lawsuit sucessfully filed against another restaurant for taking monies for the house as well as management. more

Resolved Question: Good idea for party 10pts?

My 18th Birthday is in a months time, im having it at a night club, my parents are paying for a bar tab as my present (approx $800 AUS). I need a way to make sure the bar tab doesn't get abused. Heres what i was thinking! Get wrist bands like they have at dance parties, and only people with wristbands (close friends) can use the bar tab. Get some cards made up (like frequent coffee club cards), basically a card the size of a business card with 5 circles or something on it and i would give one to all my friends, when they buy a drink the bartender crosses them off, so basically everyone gets five drinks, and if they dont want 5 they can give there card to some one else. Is it all just to complex? Any other ideas? more

Resolved Question: star if you like them =D?

A new business was opening and one of the owner's friends wanted to send him flowers for the occasion. They arrived at the new business site and the owner read the card,.... "Rest in Peace." The owner was angry and called the florist to complain. After he had told the florist of the obvious mistake and how angry he was, the florist replied, "Sir, I'm really sorry for the mistake, but rather than getting angry, you should imagine this: somewhere, there is a funeral taking place today, and they have flowers with a note saying,... 'Congratulations on your new location!' --------------------------------------------------------------------- A cowboy is traveling on his horse when he sees a bar. He decides to stop for a few drinks, so he ties his horse outside the bar, walks into the bar, sits right up at the counter and orders a few beers. The cowboy is new in town, so he notices some of the other bar patrons giving him funny looks, and he suspects that they'll try something funny, but he continues to drink. When he's satisfied, he pays for the beers and walks out of the bar only to find his horse missing. However, he keeps his cool, struts back into the bar, puts on a really mean look and says, "Look, I don't know what you asses did to my horse out there...but I'm planning to make a move on within the next FIVE minutes, and if my horse isn't back where it's supposed to be by then, well...I'm gonna have to do here what I did in Texas!" The cowboy sneers. "And I DON'T wanna do what I did in Texas!" The cowboy glares at everyone before returning to the counter and ordering another couple of beers. The other customers seem a bit shaken, and sure enough after 5 minutes, the cowboy walks out and finds his horse tied where it was supposed to be. Just as he's about to leave, the bartender approaches him and asks, "Just out of curiosity, partner. What was it you did in Texas that you didn't want to do here?" The cowboy turns to the bartender, gives a lopsided grin and replies, "I had to walk home!" ---------------------------------------------------------- Little Johnny was sitting in class doing math problems when his teacher picked him to answer a question, "Johnny, if there were five birds sitting on a fence and you shot one with your gun, how many would be left?" "None," replied Johnny, "cause the rest would fly away." "Well, the answer is four," said the teacher, "but I like the way you're thinking." Little Johnny says, "I have a question for you. If there were three women eating ice cream cones in a shop, one was licking her cone, the second was biting her cone and the third was sucking her cone, which one is married?" "Well," said the teacher nervously, "I guess the one sucking the cone." "No," said Little Johnny, "the one with the wedding ring on her finger, but I like the way you're thinking." ------------------------------------------------------ A man walks into the front door of a bar. He is obviously drunk. he staggers up to the bar, seats himself on a stool, and with a belch, asks the bartender for a drink. The bartender politely informs the man that it appears that he has already had plenty to drink--he could not be served additional liquor at this bar but could get a cab called for him. The drunk is briefly surprised then softly scoffs, grumbles, climbs down off the bar stool, and staggers out the front door. A few minutes later, the same drunk stumbles in the side door of the bar. He wobbles up to the bar and hollers for a drink. The bartender comes over, and still politely--but more firmly refuses service to the man due to his inebriation. Again, the bartender offers to call a cab for him. The drunk looks at the bartender for a moment angrily, curses, and shows himself out the side door, all the while grumbling and shaking his head. A few minutes later, the same drunk bursts in through the back door of the bar. He plops himself up on a bar stool, gathers his wits, and belligerently orders a drink. The bartender comes over and emphatically reminds the man that he is clearly drunk, will be served no drinks, and either a cab or the police will be called immediately. The surprised drunk looks at the bartender and in hopeless anguish, cries "Man! How many bars do you work at?" ------------------------------------------------------------- A science teacher asked her students "Children, if you could own one mineral what would it be? one boy said, "I would choose gold. Its worth lots of money and I could buy a Corvette." Another boy said " I would want platinum because its worth more than gold and I could buy a Porsche." the teacher said, "Johnny, What would you want? Johnny said "I would want silicone." "Why would you want silicone?" Asked the teacher "Well my mom got some, he replied. And there's always a Porsche or Corvette sitting in our driveway ani one understand the last one? explain to me please. Star if you like the i think that the 2nd 3rd and fourth is funny especially the 2nd one =D more

Resolved Question: Are there any lawyers here?

A man walks into a bar and he's really angry. The bartender gives him a drink and asks what the problem is. All he says is, "all lawyers are a*******." A man sitting in the corner shouts, "I take offense to that!" The pissed-off guy asks him, "why? Are you a lawyer?" He replies, "no, Im AN a******." Q: Why was the lawyer skimming the Bible right before he died? A: He was looking for loopholes! An airliner was having engine trouble, and the pilot instructed the cabin crew to have the passengers take their seats and get prepared for an emergency landing. A few minutes later, the pilot asked the flight attendants if everyone was buckled in and ready. "All set back here, Captain," came the reply, "except one lawyer who is still going around passing out business cards." Did you hear about the lawyer from Texas who was so big when he died that they couldn't find a coffin big enough to hold the body? They gave him an enema and buried him in a shoebox. more

Resolved Question: I need deas to advertise and network. I am a Bartender and would like to put myself out there.?

What is the best way to net work and advertise myself? I have already put myself on Craigslist and myspace. I have business cards made but where do I go to leave them at? I bought a new truck to haul my portable bar with me, should I slap a sticker on my back window? On my wht 2008 Nissan Frontier? Or should I get one of those magnets at Kinko's they print out a Business type card and you slap it on the side of your truck like ones that construction workers have. Now here's my question. I already have a liscense plate holder that says gigisbartendingservices@yahoo.com. It is not very eye catching. Is it even okay to advertise something like bartending services on ones vehicle? I have not seen anyone advertise for bartending, I have seen construction, DJ services, catering, Landscaping but never bartending. I need your opinion what do you all think? My goal is to at least bartend private parties at least twice a month. 3 is even better. But how do I get there? Please help. Thank you! more

Resolved Question: Got her phone number, now what?

I went out last night with a few friends for a Halloween party @ a club. When I walked in, I immediately noticed the bartender because she used to bartend at another place I used to go to and I always thought she was very beautiful. At that time though she was engaged so I of course I'm not going to hit on her; she was always very nice and quick to get me drinks. In all honesty I liked her but couldn't pursue her. Last night she wasn't wearing a ring, so I gently took her hand and asked what happened? She said she dumped the guy; I gave her a "wide-eyes OK" look that made her laugh and she kept lookin my way all night but since she was working, I didn't say anything to her unless I ordered another drink. After I closed by tab and gave her a very nice tip, I walked away to hang with my friends. A few minutes later, in this dark-loud club, she starts waving me over to the end of the bar and thx me for a great tip. I asked her if she was back to bartending? She replied that its only when a club needs her and the extra cash does help her with her clothing line business. She told me a little more about her business but considering it was so loud, I didn't want to carry such a convo in a loud area so I asked if she had a business card. She said she did but they were all in her car so I suggested she write down her email address. She goes to the register, comes back with a piece of paper - her email address wasn't on there, it was her phone number. But after she gave me the number, she walked off and started to take more orders - which was understandable considering she needs to make a lot of tip money for her business so I left for the night. I maybe be blind here and the reason I'm asking this on here because I'm not sure if I should call her since she walked off after giving me her number and not saying anything. If there are ladies that are bartenders reading this, please give your insight but I'm still interested in what other people may want to say. Thank you. more

Resolved Question: Does anyone know a site to go to for a free bartender design for business cards?

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Resolved Question: what should i say to this guy?

I hangout at this local bar every so often, the first night i met the bartender we hit it off and he asked for my phone number, i heard he has a girlfriend, so i gave him my card(business purposes) and i left to go to a freinds house,he found out i was there(he is also friends w/him) and he came over,i crashed on the couch and him on the floor.Everytime i go in there he makes comments to me about calling me and flirts w/me,at one point he yelled to me'i love you' as i was leaving.I usually blow off his comments and continue to have fun w/my friends and other people there even though i like him,but i hear he has a girlfriend so i dont want to be'the other girl'.Im tired of getting the impression that he likes me more than a bar flirt and i want to find out,what should i say to him? more

Resolved Question: Ok..Im making business cards and I need help..?

I am a bartender, and looking for some summer parties to bartend at. What is a good catchy phrase, like, summer dates going fast book now..or make your next social gathering great, hire me as a pesonal bartender. You know what i mean? something catchy. Thanks!! Whoever helps me out, i will drink a shot for you on the house.lol. more

Resolved Question: what is a good email address for this?

My first name is Shannon and I am making up my business cards for my bartender career. I am also a certified mixoligist. What do you think? more

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